Such A Sad Beautiful Thing......
Love & EnvyBefore I knew you, I never understood the concept of envy, because I believed that I should fight to claim the right to own what I want. Only in doing so, did it make having what I had meaningful, having fought with all my heart and soul for them. I never envied others who had what I did not have, because what they had were gifts, luxuries that were not earned with their own blood and toil. Hence, I came to love fighting for what I want, for what I believe in, because I find it meaningful.
Then I met you. And I realized that it was the gifts from others, from you, that were truly precious. Because those are the things that, no matter how much I sacrifice, no matter what price I pay, no matter how hard I fight, I can never earn them with my own blood. They have to be given, with love, in order to be received in comfort. They have to be given, with grace, in order to be received with heart. It was then that I found that I had very little gifts, very little to lose, and a deep longing for the ultimate gift that I can ever receive. The heart of the woman I love, that I cannot have, but crave in all sadness for all infinite eternity.
You taught me love.
You taught me envy.
Such a sad beautiful thing......
~Havoc~
